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The Top Fictional Characters Every Christian Had a Weird Crush On

October 19, 2021

Everyone gets weird crushes they can’t explain, and for those of us who were only exposed to Christian media are no different; just because we only watched Veggie Tales, Prince of Egypt, and other Christian kid shows doesn’t mean we didn’t have crushes.

Recently I went ahead and asked Christians to anonymously share the fictional character they had a weird attraction to, and the answers didn’t disappoint:

“Can someone explain to me why Dreamworks had to make Moses so attractive in Prince of Egypt? Like…dude was attractive in that movie but the guilt for having a crush on Moses is real”

“Not gonna lie Moses in Prince of Egypt…that a man right there”

“Moses in Prince of Egypt, I remember a scene where his hair was blowing in the wind and 8 year old me was all “whoah””

“Don’t judge me, but when I was a kid I had a weird thing for the Rumor Weed from the Larry Boy special. I just googled a photo and I am deeply ashamed since I’m pretty sure she was supposed to look like a middle aged lady.”

“The correct answer here is Prince Caspian. This is why I had a crush on every boy with long hair in high school”

“My mom wanted me to only watch Christian shows to keep my eyes pure but girl I was struggling to keep my eyes off Prince Caspian from the Narnia series”

“Probably the only one saying this but my sister and I used to talk about how cute Mr Tumnes is from Lion Witch and the Wardrobe”

“That half-deer guy from Lion Witch and the Wardrobe”

“I had the biggest crush on Mr. Tumnes which is ironic because I hate the chin beard on my husband”

“Connie from Adventures in Odyssey, she was hot but also always said what was on her mind which is literally the perfect woman”

“The Esther vegetable from Veggie Tales. Why they had to make her more realistic than the other vegetables? Her eyes tho”

“VeggieTales: Esther. They gave her curves for some reason and I was into it”

“That jawline on Bibleman”

“Bibleman, especially when they would do the scene of him getting into the armor”

“Larry the Cucumber, no joke, I wish I could explain it”

“Dont share my name but I thought Larry the Cucumber was so hot, I told my friend in Sunday School and they never let me forget it”

“Larry the Cucumber but mostly only when he sang”

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