If you grew up in any denomination of Christianity, it’s likely that your church had a wild, over-the-top youth group aimed to attract teens, and give them a place to have fun while learning about God.

Over the last 30 years, the church has gotten a lot of criticism for the messaging that many youth groups aim at teenagers, from purity culture, to political agendas, to ignoring the Bible completely and focusing on building a “wild and wacky” environment filled with games and fun, but no substance.

This week, we opened us our Instagram page and asked the question: Teens, what do you REALLY want from Youth Group?” and they didn’t hold back in their answers.

With nearly 2,000 teens sending in their responses, there were a few themes that arose:

The need for REAL topics, not just typical Christian conversation:

I want to be treated my age. My youth leaders do sermons that feel like Sunday School with small group questions like “How do you know God loves you?” like I get it but also I wanna talk about actual stuff I dont know about.

Please I’m begging you, we aren’t babies. Everyone in school talk about stuff like abortion laws and I never know what to say or who to ask and youth group is always too simple and safe.

I’m a HS senior and I want more challenging sermons. Ours are just so generic like read bible pray Jesus.

Genuine convos about our life and our struggles as Christian teens. We just get lectured.

Why are we just skipping over LGBT stuff? Abortion? Trans issues? Apologetics? The news? The pastors not talking about it on Sunday so where am I supposed to learn about this?

The need for REAL, genuine community:

CO-ED CONVERSATION!!!! Guys and girls need to know how to have deep convos together.

Volunteers who aren’t trying to be perfect and expect us to be open. Sis, how am I supposed to open up to you when you ask when I dont know anything about you???

To have a time where I don’t get made fun of for a change

PLEASE STOP FORCING FRIENDSHIPS. You don’t know what goes on in high school and I might need time before I talk to someone

To relax. HIGH SCHOOL IS STRESSFUL. Youth Group is best when it’s low stress/low pressure.

I don’t know what changes to send in except that youth group is the only place where I don’t feel alone, so maybe just getting to know us and helping us make friends instead of just trying to be cool all the time.

Other Needs:

A better mix of games. I get anxiety knowing I’ll need to run around and stuff or have forced conversations.

Don’t treat it like school: strict no talking rules, taking phones, etc. Why would all that make people feel comfortable and loved? We get enough of that at school.

Not a rude youth pastor who clearly has his favorites. If I wasn’t forced to go I wouldn’t go.

Is there a way we could ask questions without fear of judgement like secretly?

I just want friends and to meet others. I hate going to school because I already don’t fit in and youth group is my only chance to talk to people I feel like I could fit in with.